Why you act like human being

Found at: 0x1bi.net:70/textfiles/file?humor/insult


Why don't you act like a human being or don't you do impersonations?

You're NUMBER ONE in my book.  My book is called "Creeps I Have Known".

You're bound to marry well - everyone is above you.

There's nothing I won't do for you - and I'm going to keep on doing it.

You're outstanding in your field, and that's where you should be -
out standing in your field.

When I want your remarks, I'll rattle your cage.

Would you mind reaching into your heart and getting me a piece of ice?

Keep talking - you'll think of something to say.

You're just what the doctor ordered - shock treatment.

Why don't you take a powder - preferably arsenic.

You came from nothing, and you brought it with you.

You've given me something to live for - REVENGE.

You're not the person you used to be - and you never were.

You have so much ugly, you could open a branch face.

You're quite a charmer - I'll get you a snake and a flute.

Do I need you?  About as much as Custer needed more Indians.

Do I need you?  About as much as the "Titanic" needed more water.

You're the kind of person I can't get over, so I'll go around you.

Let me say three little words that will make you dance on air:
"Go hang yourself!"

Your heart's in the right place - it's your head I'm worried about.

You're making a fool of yourself, and I've never seen better craftmanship.

When people ask me what I see in you, what can I tell them?

Of course I'll give you a hand - right across the mouth.