Although many think of life in a castle as a dream come true, back in Medieval times, it was only luxurious compared to everyone else’s living arrangements.
Medieval castle life bore a stark, disappointing resemblance to cave life. Damp, dark, cold and smelly…
More Stuff: Ethiopia’s Tragic Orphan Prince of the Past
At the start of the Medieval age, castle living was a lot less glamorous than it is today. And much, much sootier too. Fires, for one, weren’t confined to neat, cheery chimneys and fireplaces, but the center of the castle’s great hall.
Naturally, it was a smoky affair only somewhat relieved by the hall’s open tower above. Should you stray too far from the fire to, say, any other room, your feet would forget their function and stand in as blocks of ice to numbly skate on. Cold castles are cold, ok?
Christianity was in full fastidious sway at this point in time and a very interesting set of rules were adhered to. Gone were the days of pagan barbarities such as fine theaters, libraries, running water, baths of almost any sort and so on.
“I’ve been in a lot of castles, and they are pretty damp, cold and gloomy.” -Tracie Peterson
Medieval castle Christians were contented to crap in corners and holes, bathe up to once per year and drown the heap of sorrows salvaged from such a lifestyle in wine, mead and beer. Ah yes, and for some reason, they decided that storing coats where they regularly urinated would help to disinfect them. Not exactly what you’d hope the first eau de toilette would have been…
Thanks to their special ice houses, Medieval castle folk at least had ice all year long. Nothing goes with cold, clammy castle feet like ice.